Ash: So where is the next pokémon gym so I can get another badge? Huh? Huh?
Brock: Dammit Ash, relax. The next badge is in...
Ash: In where dammit? Where?!
Brock: In...in...my ass!
Ash: I swear you'll be the first to die!
Brock: Right Ash. Whatever.
Misty: Would you two stop already? You're giving me a freakin' headache!
Ash: That's what you said last night.
Audience: Oohhh...
Brock: C'mon now. The audience thing is such a ripoff of DBZ Rewrite.
Audience: You go girl!
Ash: Guess I'll have to find out where the next badge is myself. (Whips out his pokédex)
Pokédex: Your next badge is in Cerulean city...freak.
Ash: What was that pokédex?
Pokédex: Nothing! Bye! (Turns itself off)
Ash: Ok then, to Cerulean city we go!
Pikachu: Pika!
Misty: Cerulean city? We can't go there!
Ash: Why the hell not?!
Misty: Cuz...cuz...cuz nothing! (Runs away)
Ash: She is one crazy bitch. Anyway, which way to Cerulean city?
Brock: Well, we go...we go...
Ash: Go where? Where?!
Brock: We go...right up my ass!
Ash: Someday I will actually kill you.
The two eventually arrive at Cerulean city.
Ash: We're here! Finally! Now where is the gym, Brock?
Brock: Well Ash, it's right-
Ash: If you say it's up your ass I will kick your fucking ass so hard that you puke the gym up!
Brock: I was gonna say it's right over there, by the food court. (Points to gym)
Ash: It looks a lot like an aquarium. Well, let's go.
Upon entering the gym, the two sit down and watch a swimming act performed by three gorgeous, scantilly clad women.
Brock: Man I'd like a piece of that!
Ash: (Yelling) Take it off! Take it all off!
Security guard: Son if you don't simmer down we're going to have to ask you to leave.
Ash: Fine...
Once the performance is over, the two head over to talk to the performers.
Ash: My name's Ash, and I'm here for a badge so I can...ahhh...uhhh (Staring at their breasts)
Brock: Hello ladies. Hey! Boobs! You have boobs!
Ash: (Shakes his head) ...so I can battle in the pokémon league! Which one of you is the gym leader.
First Girl: Gym leader? Haha. This gym isn't for battling anymore. It's for our show, so people can see how beautiful we are!
Second Girl: Yeah, we're so beautiful. Look at how conceited we are. Look at my use of italics. I want to eat a ham sandwich.
Third Girl: Like, oh my god! A ham sandwich? You're crazy! You'll get so totally fat!
Ash: Well dammit. How am I supposed to get the Cerulean city badge then?
First Girl: Here, you can just have it. (Holds out a badge)
Ash: Ok! Yeah!
Misty: (Pops in from nowhere) You won't get the badge that easy Ash!
Ash: Where the hell have you been you crazy bitch?
Girls: (Snickering) He knows you pretty well!
Misty: Shut up! I'm here to protect the honor of the Cerulean city badge. I am the gym leader Ash!
Ash: The hell?! How can that be?!
First Girl: Gee sis, you sure picked an idiot for a boyfriend!
Misty: Boyfriend?!
Ash: Heh I wish. She won't give it up. Anyway, if I must battle a crazy bitch to propogate my dark reign, so be it!
Later, at the arena...
Ash: Go Pikachu! Kick Misty's ass!
Pikachu: Pika! (No!)
Ash: Why not?!
Pikachu: Pika! Pika-chu! (I want to have sex with her!)
Ash: Well I can't blame yah...Go Pidgeotto!
Pidgeotto: Pidgeotto!
Misty: Staryu! Go!
Staryu: {Water noises}
Meanwhile, as the pokémon battle...
James: You sure this plan will work Jesse? It seems so stupid!
Jesse: (Smacks James) Shut up bitch! Of course it will work!
Meowth: All this work is making me want to have a cat nap. Get it? Cuz I'm a cat! It's funny, cuz I'm a cat, and I said I wanted a-
Jesse: Shut up, shut up, shut up! For the love of God, why won't you ever shut up? We get the idea. You can talk. Woohoo. Now shut up.
James: Do what she says, or (Smacked by Jesse) Ow! Or that!
Jesse: Why does nobody shut up?! Ok, Meowth, start the vacuum tube! We'll suck their precious pokémon right up into our trap!
The machine starts up, and the water begins pumping into it.
Misty: Oh no! Staryu!
Ash: Hmm, if I help her I bet then she'll give me some! Pikachu! Shock the water!
Pikachu: Pika! (Shocks the water, causing Team Rocket to blast off into the air.)
Team Rocket: Team Rocket is exploding right the fuck out of the building again!
Misty's Sister: Here yah go Ash. I think you deserve this after saving the day like that!
Ash: Oh hell yes! Another badge!
Misty: When will he ever learn?
And so ends yet another wacky adventure. Bla bla bla.
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